Avoid the Saintly - Writers from Yorkshire

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Beware the friend who’s holier than thou

The one who thinks you’re a miserable cow

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Forever cheerful, bright and breezy

She can’t take grief it makes her queasy

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Given news of the old and infirm

She’s there like a shot to show her concern

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Then happy that she’s brightened their day

With halo in place she’s on her way

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But when you’re crossing a bridge too far

She’s at pains to point out how lucky you are

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This is not something you want to know

Now you’re not only sad but guiltily so

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Take to your bed, pull the duvet over

Ensure that for now you’re never quite sober

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Lock the door, hide your phone in a book

And avoid the saintly by hook or by crook

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